Somebody somewhere give that man a record deal!

1 You can take one record to a desert island for the rest of your life – what would it be?
- I suppose, ‘Pet Sounds’… In case you were wondering, my top 5 are, in order, ‘Pet Sounds’, ‘Sgt. Pepper’, ‘VU & Nico’, ‘Troutmask Replica’, ‘Forever Changes’. Obvious, I know, but they’re obvious for a reason.

2 Who is your favourite artist?
- Francis Bacon, when his work was good, it was amazing. I’d like to write a song about it some day. I can imagine it sounding like Scott Walker’s last couple of records.

3 Favourite chord?
- There are a couple of things I’ve made up which unfortunately, I’m fond enough of to include in half my songs. Not out of choice, my brain is just wired to hear certain things next. Of the obvious chords, I like 9ths. I try not to use them too much because they make everything sound too jazzy. But when you use them once in a while, especially if you use (for example) an A major 9th with a big thick E over the top… it sounds great. On piano I like C, you can let your mind wander and just go off in a drone.

4 Can God invent a rock that he cannot lift?
- A certainly hope so!

5 Who did you last vote for in an election?
- Green, I don’t care all that much, I just wanted to go as left as possible because there was alot of talk about the BNP.

6 Favourite fiction writer?
- I don’t read much fiction, I don’t feel like I’m learning anything. I really enjoyed Tom Wolfe’s ‘Electric Kool Aid Acid Tests’ (of course!) which is partially fiction.

7 If you could invite 5 people to dinner (dead or alive) who would they be?
- John, Paul, Brian, Don, George (H or M)

8 What pisses you off?
- Oh, so much. Not sleeping, it really bugs me.

9 What’s the best song you’ve ever written?
- It’s really hard to say. Because recordings never end up as you hoped they would, you can write a song and think “Christ, I’ve really done it here” and the recording just sounds flat and nothingy. By the same token, you can write a song which sounds pretty average and the recording works out really well (which is what happened with my latest song ‘Sally’s Yard’. I’m quite proud of it now that it’s recorded).

10 One wish – what would it be?
- Just a soundproof room with enough space for my stuff. Maybe with a mellotron and a couple of ribbon mics.

11 Favourite band?
- The Beatles, I can’t imagine ever giving a different answer.

12 3 websites worth checking out?
- www.myspace.com/thefallingfloors (obviously), Captain Beefheart’s wikipedia page (I check it every day with a lump in my throat half expecting it to say “1941 – 2009″), and www.lego.com

13 Posters above your bed when you were a teenager?
- Alot of Queens of the Stone Age and Kyuss and stuff like that.

14 When was the last time you cried with laughter?
- My girlfriend managed to go her entire life thinking that Chupa Chups were called Chub Chubs.

15 If you could learn and play one instrument, what would it be?
- I’d really like to be able to play flute.

16 Preferred mode of travel?
- I hate cars, I freak out on the motorway. Trains or planes I don’t mind, because any time one of them crashes you hear about it on the news, but cars crash every day.

17 Shuffle your iPod – what are the first five songs that play?
- I don’t have one. I write most songs while walking, and that can’t happen with iPods.

18 Snowballs, snowmen, or sledging?
- Both!

19 Best gig you’ve ever been to?
- Jonathan Richman, I never wanted it to end.

20 What’s the most embarrassing record in your collection?
- Paul McCartney’s song for Rupert the Bear, the sleeve is horrendous.

21 Favourite drink?
- Kahlua.

22 Drug of choice?
- Meth under the eyelids.

23 If you were an animal, what animal would you be?
- A ruff.

24 And if you were a colour, what colour would you be?
- Brown lipstick.

25 Are you good at any sports?
- None.

26 Last book you read?
- Revolution in the Head, I keep coming back to it as a reference guide.

27 First thing you think when you get up in the morning?
- Oh, Paul McCartney.

28 Last thing you think when you go to bed?
- Oh, Paul McCartney.

29 Describe your music in three words?
- Could be better/worse (I can’t decide).

30 If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be?
- Paul McCartney.

31 Favourite comedian?
- Mitch Hedberg.

32 What colour is your front door?
- Clear.

33 Favourite film?
- Duck Soup.

34 A quote that stuck in your head?
- “That woman had a fish for a head!” “Well that’s her problem”

35 Favourite subject at school?
- Art.

36 Which actor/actress would play you in a film about your life?
- Bill Murray.

37 What music makes you want to dance?
- ‘Only Seventeen’ by the Beattlettes.

38 What should they write on your gravestone?
- As long as it’s in neon I don’t care.

39 How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man?
- Just that one that cuts through Hulme near the Job Centre. I made it once, but I had to get the bus back.

40 When did you first start writing your own songs?
- I wrote my first song in junior school. All I remember is that I drew a picture of the Eiffel Tower at the top of the notation page, and I have no idea what I wrote because I can barely even read tab now. Maybe it was like John Cage or something.

41 What’s the weirdest thing you ever saw?
- An old queen.

42 Favourite smell?
- Certain plastics.

43 Favourite sound?
- Someone else using a hair dryer, a vacuum cleaner in the next room, standing near the extractor fan at night. Those big warm mechanical sounds.

44 Swings, roundabout, chute, or climbing frame?
- Climbing frame.

45 Who is your favourite Beatle?
- Paul McCartney!

46 Point us in the direction of a band one of your friends is in?
- www.myspace.com/oldkingmusic

47 A YouTube video the world should watch?
- Search ‘Falling Floors Nexus’.

48 Cats or dogs?
- Cats.

49 If you had to join the circus what would you be?
- I’d play the calliope.

50 Favourite book?
- ‘Wouldn’t It Be Nice’ by Brian Wilson.

51 Have you ever been on TV?
- I certainly hope not.

52 Have you ever been arrested?
- No.

53 What songs do you (would you) sing at karaoke?
- I always wanted to do ‘The Sun Ain’t Gonna Shine Anymore’.

54 Have you ever seen a ghost?
- I thought I did when I was a kid, he was stood on top of a house.

55 How do you like your coffee? Or would you prefer a wee cup of tea?
- Strong, with a couple of sugars. I get headaches if I don’t drink enough coffee.

56 Punk or Raver? Mod or Goth? Hippy or Beatnik? If you had to label yourself, what gang would you be in?
- I’m Psychedelicate!

57 What’s the worst job you ever had?
- Working behind a bar. It’s like working in a bookshop, except when someone pays for a book, you have to write it yourself, quickly, and write it well. And the customer is drunk.

58 What’s brown and sticky?
- Brown lipstick!

59 Do you have any recurring dreams?
- I used to, about elephants and a mountain.

60 How many records have you released and which is your favourite?
- That all depends on what you mean by ‘released’…

61 Where in the world would you like to go?
- I love Paris, if I could speak French I’d go back there and never return.

62 Favourite kind of cloud?
- Lemonaide.

63 Favourite line from a song?
- “Fur is wonderful, fur’s not leather, furthermore I love you furever!”

64 What’s the music scene like where you live?
- I don’t see much of it. I suppose it’s much the same as it is anywhere.

65 Who would make up your dream band? (one singer, one guitarist, one bassist, one drummer, plus one extra)
- Scott Walker, Jacques Dutronc, Paul McCartney, Hal Blaine, Alan Hawkshaw.

66 Favourite cover art?
- All the Philips Twen records.

67 Early bird or night owl?
- Owl.

68 Which of the seven sins are you?
- Omega 3.

69 Three words people use to describe you?
- Could be better/worse (I can’t decide).

70 You have ten minutes left to live, what would you do?
- Listen to ‘Golden Slumbers/Carry that Weight/The End’. I think I’d have time.

71 Do you support any sports teams?
- None.

71 What do you want for Christmas?
- Money to put out a record. Or a record deal.

72 Favourite track from all the Daydream Generation compilations?
- I really liked The Hoborchestra track at the start of DG6.

73 Can you cook up a storm in the kitchen?
- Toast.

74 What’s the first thing you remember?
- Losing a balloon.

75 How do you go about writing a song?
- Wait for it to happen.

76 When you look in the mirror, what do you see?
- A grey-haired old man staring back at me.

77 What’s the best advice you were ever given?
- “Just try a little bit”

78 Do you smoke?
- Do you joke?

79 Tell us a joke?
- Tell us a smoke?

80 Pick a card, any card?
- I’m sick of cards.

81 One question you’ve never been able to answer?
- “How much do you think you’ve earned?”

82 If you could travel back in time, when and where would you go?
- 1960, to see what it was like when music existed for a decade.

83 Favourite philosopher?
- Is there a non-pretentious answer to this? No, I don’t think so. I guess I’ll say Satre, it’s more relevent than Plato or anything.

84 Do you have any pets?
- George is at my parent’s house.

85 Ever climbed a mountain?
- Not physically.

86 What do you do in the real world to pay the rent?
- I work in a bookshop called Magma and I DJ at a bar called Big Hands.

87 Self-diagnosis: any psychiatric disorders?
- I hope not.

88 Favourite poet?
- Leonard Cohen I guess.

89 What wouldn’t you do for a million dollars?
- What WOULDN’T I do more like!

90 Adrenalin junky?
- Not even slightly.

91 What bands have you been in?
- I was in a couple in college, then I was a group called Horse Hair, we released a 3″ CD and a tape, both in paisley fabric. You can hear it at www.myspace.com/hosehairhorsehair

92 Favourite board game/computer game?
- Shithead.

93 What kind of recording set-up do you have? Equipment etc.
- A few shit microphones, an old 70’s desk, a digital multitrack (because I usually play everything myself), then I mix it down to 1/4″ tape on a TEAC A-3340S.

94 A character you love from a book or a film?
- Roberto Benigni’s character in Down By Law.
95 Who is the sexiest person in the history of the world?
- Serge Gainsbourg.
96 If you could genetically fuse two animals together what would they be? And what would it make?
- A human and an animal. It would make a humanimal I suppose.
97 What kind of drunk are you?
- Changes every time.
98 What was the first record that really blew your mind?
- I guess, ‘Rated R’ when I was 12. It had a pretty all-encompassing impact on me at the time.
99 What are your musical plans for the future?
- Definately keep on making records, maybe never play live ever again.
100 Got some websites of your own we can visit?
- I mentioned it already. www.myspace.com/thefallingfloors

CATEGORIES:COZY HOME, INTERVIEWS, QUIXODELIC RECORDS, THE FALLING FLOORS